Happy Accidents

: lostboy_lj; August 25th, 0:15

Clocks of the Long Now

Summary: Four years after the gang helped Sunnydale perform its swan dive into Hell, a terrifying new enemy emerges from an unexpected quarter. As secrets are revealed and old friends are reunited, the greatest Apocalypse of all looms ever closer. Will they save the day one last time?

Fandom: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Season: Post-Chosen, Post-NFA
Characters: Lots
Chapters: 45
Word Count: ~200,000
Warnings: Graphic violence, adult language, sexual situations, character death, rabbits.
Disclaimer: The characters from Buffy the Vampire Slayer are owned by Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, Fox studios and maybe various other entities that I am unaware of but totally respect and admire. This story is not meant to infringe upon anyone's rights, only to entertain.

Author's note: This is basically a "Season 12" story, with bits and pieces of (non-canonical) Seasons 8-11 fleshed in along the way. I've been told by some readers that it is a Spuffy tale, but I'm not so sure. It's definitely not a Gillow or a Xandrew or a Fawn, but all of those people and more are deeply involved in the goings-on. So, basically, this is just a possible continuation of the show that appeared in my head, set after the BTVS and AtS TV shows ended. I guess that's all a long way of saying "Spuffy-friendly Ensemble Future Fic," so I'll just say that and shut up.

( Table of Contents )

Tags: btvs fanfiction, clocks of the long now

Obligatory Andrew Wells / Star Wars Post

: lostboy_lj; April 28th, 21:46

(skip ahead to 2:35 for the goodness)

Non Sequitur Lostboy Post

: lostboy_lj; April 21st, 20:14

Hey there f-list gangsters. Since I haven't posted anything in ages, I decided to just throw together a random potpourri of stuff that's been on my mind of late:

( On the Subject of My Insatiable Appetite for Destruction )

( On Writing and Fandom (or Lack Thereof) )

( Pictures of the Internet's Soul )

Go, run, rec

: lostboy_lj; March 10th, 23:58

Hey everybody! My f-list buddy

eilowyn's new community,

spuffy_recs is open for business. Go and feed it lots of cookies and beer!

Angel Doing Stuff

: lostboy_lj; March 10th, 23:46

For those who haven't seen it yet, Angel Does Stuff.

Not world-end-y stuff or Evil Lawyer stuff or outer space sex stuff...

Just, you know...

... stuff.

Sometimes with friends!

O, hai, New Favorite Show!!!

: lostboy_lj; February 5th, 15:20

( Read more... )

Tags: reviews

Midnight Empire (5/?)

: lostboy_lj; February 1st, 17:11

Midnight Empire
Chapter 5: Bargain Hunting

Summary: When the Slayer and her gang come to New York City, they quickly discover what it's like to work the toughest demon beat on Earth, battling ancient prophecies, supernatural fiends, outrageously high rents and more. Unfortunately, nothing in the city is as it seems. The streets are paved with deadly secrets, and before long the Scoobies and their L.A. counterparts find themselves drawn into a thousand-year-old conspiracy that threatens to destroy the world. Sequel to Clocks of the Long Now.

Fandoms: Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Angel
Season: Post-Chosen, Post-NFA
Chapters: ?
Word Count: ?
Rating: R
Warnings: Do not drink while operating heavy machinery, slippery when wet, beware of dog
Betas: dampersnspoons
Disclaimer: The characters from "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" and "Angel" are owned by Joss Whedon, David Greenwalt, Mutant Enemy, Fox studios and maybe various other entities that I am unaware of but totally respect and fear. This story is not meant to infringe upon anyone's rights, only to entertain.

(view previous chapters)

( Read more... )

Tags: btvs, btvs fanfiction, buffy the vampire slayer, midnight empire

Midnight Empire (4/?)

: lostboy_lj; January 25th, 11:46

Midnight Empire
Chapter 4: Travel Agencies

Summary: When the Slayer and her gang come to New York City, they quickly discover what it's like to work the toughest demon beat on Earth, battling ancient prophecies, supernatural fiends, outrageously high rents and more. Unfortunately, nothing in the city is as it seems. The streets are paved with deadly secrets, and before long the Scoobies and their L.A. counterparts find themselves drawn into a thousand-year-old conspiracy that threatens to destroy the world. Sequel to Clocks of the Long Now.

Fandoms: Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Angel
Season: Post-Chosen, Post-NFA
Chapters: ?
Word Count: ?
Rating: R
Warnings: Do not drink while operating heavy machinery, slippery when wet, beware of dog
Betas: dampersnspoons
Disclaimer: The characters from "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" and "Angel" are owned by Joss Whedon, David Greenwalt, Mutant Enemy, Fox studios and maybe various other entities that I am unaware of but totally respect and fear. This story is not meant to infringe upon anyone's rights, only to entertain.

(view previous chapters)

( Read more... )

Tags: btvs fanfiction, buffy the vampire slayer, midnight empire

Midnight Empire (3/?)

: lostboy_lj; January 21st, 11:47

Midnight Empire
Chapter 3: The City That Never Shuts the Hell Up

Summary: When the Slayer and her gang come to New York City, they quickly discover what it's like to work the toughest demon beat on Earth, battling ancient prophecies, supernatural fiends, outrageously high rents and more. Unfortunately, nothing in the city is as it seems. The streets are paved with deadly secrets, and before long the Scoobies and their L.A. counterparts find themselves drawn into a thousand-year-old conspiracy that threatens to destroy the world. Sequel to Clocks of the Long Now.

Fandoms: Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Angel
Season: Post-Chosen, Post-NFA
Chapters: ?
Word Count: ?
Rating: R
Warnings: Do not drink while operating heavy machinery, slippery when wet, beware of dog
Betas: dampersnspoons
Disclaimer: The characters from "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" and "Angel" are owned by Joss Whedon, David Greenwalt, Mutant Enemy, Fox studios and maybe various other entities that I am unaware of but totally respect and fear. This story is not meant to infringe upon anyone's rights, only to entertain.

(view previous chapters)

( Read more... )

Tags: btvs fanfiction, buffy the vampire slayer, midnight empire

Midnight Empire (2/?)

: lostboy_lj; January 20th, 17:21

Midnight Empire
Chapter 2: Technical Difficulties

Summary: When the Slayer and her gang come to New York City, they quickly discover what it's like to work the toughest demon beat on Earth, battling ancient prophecies, supernatural fiends, outrageously high rents and more. Unfortunately, nothing in the city is as it seems. The streets are paved with deadly secrets, and before long the Scoobies and their L.A. counterparts find themselves drawn into a thousand-year-old conspiracy that threatens to destroy the world. Sequel to Clocks of the Long Now.

Fandoms: Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Angel
Season: Post-Chosen, Post-NFA
Chapters: ?
Word Count: ?
Rating: R
Warnings: Do not drink while operating heavy machinery, slippery when wet, beware of dog
Betas: dampersnspoons, aerintine
Disclaimer: The characters from "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" and "Angel" are owned by Joss Whedon, David Greenwalt, Mutant Enemy, Fox studios and maybe various other entities that I am unaware of but totally respect and fear. This story is not meant to infringe upon anyone's rights, only to entertain.

(view previous chapters)

( Read more... )

Tags: btvs fanfiction, buffy the vampire slayer, midnight empire

Midnight Empire (1/?)

: lostboy_lj; January 18th, 17:50

Midnight Empire
Chapter 1: It's a Bird, It's a Plane

Summary: When the Slayer and her gang come to New York City, they quickly discover what it's like to work the toughest demon beat on Earth, battling ancient prophecies, supernatural fiends, outrageously high rents and more. Unfortunately, nothing in the city is as it seems. The streets are paved with deadly secrets, and before long the Scoobies and their L.A. counterparts find themselves drawn into a thousand-year-old conspiracy that threatens to destroy the world.

Fandoms: Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Angel
Season: Post-Chosen, Post-NFA
Chapters: ?
Word Count: ?
Rating: R
Warnings: Do not drink while operating heavy machinery, slippery when wet, beware of dog
Betas: dampersnspoons, aerintine
Disclaimer: The characters from "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" and "Angel" are owned by Joss Whedon, David Greenwalt, Mutant Enemy, Fox studios and maybe various other entities that I am unaware of but totally respect and fear. This story is not meant to infringe upon anyone's rights, only to entertain.

Author's note: This is a direct sequel to my fic, Clocks.of the Long Now, and picks up soon after that story's epilogue. While this new tale is very different, large portions of it probably won't make sense to someone who didn't already read the first story. So, I guess the above qualifies as my 'warning'. As far as explicit content (character deaths, violence, sexy times, etc), if you've read my other stuff then you probably know what to expect in this one.

( Read more... )

Tags: btvs fanfiction, buffy the vampire slayer, clocks of the long now, midnight empire

Buffy, Season One: the season that wasn't?

: lostboy_lj; January 10th, 15:03

I'm still in the process of my epic re-watch of the Whedonverse, but the question that struck me very early on was this: is Season One of BtVS really a "season"?

I mean, it is a season, in lots of obvious ways. It has a central problem to be solved, a subtext and a particular arc that is referenced in future seasons. But there are also some very un-season-y things about it, many of which I think can be traced to its nature as a pilot season (only 12 episodes instead of the usual 24).

There's The Master, for one thing - by far the least interesting enemy in the series. I remember in a conversation I had with a friend, we decided that he was so boring and featureless that he didn't even deserve the badge of "Big Bad," and we've been calling him "Middle Bad" and "The Big Bland" ever since. There was also the lengthy (albeit necessary) exposition, and general prologue-y feel about everything, as though they are trying to give you some clues and references upfront before the actual story commences. There are seemingly important characters (like Xander's friend Jesse McNally) who die and are never mentioned again. There is a bit of a rushed feeling to the way the climax is assembled and delivered, and it feels a little tacked on. Like, "Oh, we should kill the bad guy here, just in case we get canceled."

( Read more... )

Thoughts about betrayal in the Buffyverse

: lostboy_lj; January 9th, 9:10

To help with a new fic I'm writing, I've been doing a re-watch of both "Buffy" and "Angel" lately. It has inspired a few random thoughts. One of the thoughts that struck me is that the bad guys in the Buffyverse (and perhaps in all plays, films and TV shows) are largely marked by their instinct to betray. This is especially true amongst the show's seasonal Big Bads.

( BtVS spoilery ahead, so don't read this, Mark... )

Tags: btvs, buffy the vampire slayer, meta, thinky thoughts

Bookend Imagery in BtVS

: lostboy_lj; January 6th, 16:24

Hailing from a background in painting and commercial art, I think I tend to pay a lot of extra attention to the composition of shots in films and TV shows. I don't think the attention is either undue or completely subjective - I've worked with art directors, and have a good sense of the kinds of conversations that lead to visual decisions - but I also know that the visual language of most TV shows is generally geared towards servicing the setting and tone (as well as constrained by other stuff like budget, the needs of the plot, etc). Still, I think that with a special show like "Buffy: the Vampire Slayer" we sometimes don't pay enough attention to the visual language and the recurring motifs that supply their own layer of meaning.

In case you didn't already know, "Buffy" is the single greatest show in TV history, crafted by the finest storytellers of our generation. Like Alice's rabbit hole, it is outwardly simple by design, yet thematically as deep as a canyon, leading its viewers to a secret world rich with symbols and meaning. Its supernatural premise evokes all of the greatest monster stories ever told, and helps to foster the kind of primal mythology human beings have always created to in order to better understand ourselves and our place in the world.

"Buffy" wasn't the Dadaist anti-art of the fractured, neurotic 20th century, either. It was the grand art of Michelangelo's ceiling and Dante's verse. But in many ways it was an even older kind of art, because, despite the oversimplified caricature of Joss Whedon as the "author" that is usually presented, it was a work of art made by many hands and minds. Like the myths of Ancient Greece and Rome, the show had both no author and countless authors.

( Read more... )

Tags: btvs, buffy the vampire slayer, meta, thinky thoughts

The Highbrow Fart Joke: Misleading Metaphors, False Themes and Other Comic Devices in the Buffyverse

: lostboy_lj; December 10th, 2011

The Highbrow Fart Joke:
Misleading Metaphors, False Themes and Other Comic Devices in the Buffyverse

by Lostboy

Yea, noise? Then I’ll be brief.
O happy dagger!
This is thy sheath.

Juliet in Romeo and Juliet (V, iii, 169-170)

WILLOW: Maybe you're trying too hard. Doesn't this happen to every vampire?
SPIKE: Not to me, it doesn't!

"The Intiative", Buffy the Vampire Slayer (4.08)

I recently wrote an essay about weapons in "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" and their metaphorical origins, during the course of which I coined the term "highbrow fart joke" (or, at least I think I coined it; I've never heard anyone else use it before, and it sounds like the sort of dumb thing I would suddenly dream up). I didn't dwell on it too much; I was mainly using it to illustrate a point about the actual thematic relevance of Spike's chip versus its momentary gag treatment in "The Initiative" and "Pangs."

Now - at the risk of Ruining All Comedy Forever by explaining a bunch of jokes - I am going to dwell on it. I am going to dwell on the farts. Come dwell with me, gentle reader!

First thing's first: I don't think that Joss Whedon, or any of the other creators of Buffy, invented the highbrow fart joke. That's sort of why I included Juliet's famous line above. Juliet wasn't joking (indeed, this was a tragic scene; one of the purest and most shockingly tragic moments The Bard ever wrote), but the point I was trying to make was about text-versus-subtext, and the role that the self-consciousness of the character plays in whether something is a metaphor designed by the author for thematic significance or a metaphor that the character herself uses for her own poetic purpose.

Juliet's "happy dagger" is a phallic and violently sexual image, but both Shakespeare and Juliet likely recognize this, given the context of everything that transpired in the play before she said it. She seems to be conscious of the allusion she is making; these are her last words, after all. Therefore the purpose is not to make an artistic comment about sex and violence, but rather to signify a sense of profound and dramatic irony within her despair; Juliet knows she cannot have Romeo's "happy dagger" now, so she will embrace the cold comfort of this harsh world's version instead, and the sweet release of death.

To put it another way: Juliet knows she can't have "the little death", so she will settle for the Big One.

( Read more... )

Tags: btvs, buffy the vampire slayer, meta, thinky thoughts

The Meta Arsenal: Stakes, Fangs and Other Symbolic Weaponry in "Buffy the Vampire Slayer"

: lostboy_lj; December 7th, 2011

The Meta Arsenal:
Stakes, Fangs and Other Symbolic Weaponry in "Buffy the Vampire Slayer"

by Lostboy

He who fights with monsters might take care lest he thereby become a monster. And if you gaze for long into an abyss, the abyss gazes also into you.

- Friedrich Nietzsche, Beyond Good and Evil

Being a vampire sucks!

- Harmony Kendall, "The Harsh Light of Day"

A short while back, my LJ friend blackfrancine advanced a theory about the use of the stake as a phallic symbol, both in Buffy the Vampire Slayer and within vampire lore generically. We had a fun conversation about it (during the course of which we stumbled upon some very interesting territory regarding a different symbolic weapon in Buffy's arsenal - more about that later), but I left it still thinking that the notion of the stake as meta-wiener was a case of Freud missing the forest through the phallic trees.

There are a couple of reasons for that, but before I get into them, I wanted to talk about the novel, Dracula, a bit. During our weapons discussion, she noted that part of her reasoning behind stake-as-phallus was that the vampire's fangs were themselves phallic, and that the biting of the throat therefore symbolized sexual penetration. That notion struck me as a bit hypotactic, since the mouth is itself a sexual organ, and one that is gender neutral. After all, both men and women use their mouths in erotic ways: to kiss, to lick and suckle, to nibble and bite. During puberty, we sometimes even ritualize this mouth play; I surely wasn't the only boy in the world to receive the dreaded “hickey” from a girl who was subtly marking me as her sexual property.

So, when Dracula bites Lucy Westernra, it's maybe sufficient but surely not necessary that he “penetrates” her with some sort of metaphorical dual-penis in his mouth. In fact, the mechanics of the sex act itself aren't pertinent; the transformation that occurs in its wake is what matters: Lucy herself becomes a “biter”, complete with a set of fangs. If we tried to see Dracula as a symbolic male penetrator with phallic fangs, the metaphor would fall apart completely. Lucy's fall is not that she becomes a penetrative "man"; it's that she becomes a sexualized woman. This is the sexual danger of Dracula; not that he penetrates, but that he sexualizes, and his victims therefore become similarly dangerous new viral transmitters of his lust and moral decay.

( Read more... )

Tags: btvs, buffy the vampire slayer, meta, thinky thoughts

Shipping-meme

: lostboy_lj; November 16th, 2011

meme from

blackfrancine, among others. I got my brains all twisted trying to figure some of hers out, so I thought I'd pass along my pain. Pay it forward, and whatnot.

(1) Think of up to 25 ships you support.
(2) List them using descriptions of the characters involved rather than their names.
(3) Have your f-list guess as many of the ships as they can.

Here's my list:

1) They're on the run and she's running out of time. But then again, who isn't?
2) He's not quite enough to get her excited, but she could be a little nicer (just not to her sibling, thank you very much).
3) His skin color makes life difficult sometimes, and she has violent fits of psychotic rage.
4) Her life would be so much simpler if she just stopped saving him.
5) These survivors put the "complex" back in "military-industrial complex."
6) Two true believers keep their eyes on the skies, but for totally different reasons.
7) They dance divinely and their duels are frightfully sexy, but they should be careful; that furniture looks expensive!
8) They have major communication problems and it can't possibly work out, but he's got her in the palm of his hand.
9) A pint-sized polymath reminds her of something she lost, but he has a different plot in mind. Cui bono?
10) He may not be a model business partner, but her other career went down the drain.
11) There's chemistry between them... and that's the problem, really.
12) Everybody knows their names.
13) A mentally ill magician seeks justice in the night. Though they often clash, she cannot tell a lie; that robe of his is a major turn-on.
14) This evil duo's relationship still seems to be stuck in the cocoon phase. At least her ex-boss isn't haunting her anymore.
15) Reaganomics couldn't explain the supply of love in their relationship, and Radical Feminism couldn't explain our demand for it. Maybe something was happening behind the scenes?
16) His living camouflage slowly turns him human, but is that what daddy really wanted?

Answers as they arrive below the cut.( Read more... )

shipping-meme time!

Fic Recs and Final Banners

: lostboy_lj; April 29th, 2011

Current Mood:: restless

Hi f-list!

I know I haven't posted in ages. Real life has been kicking my ass in IMAX 3D, lately. I have been catching up on my fandom reading, though, and have a few recs locked and loaded. I also put the final touches on my character banner project for "Clocks", which I have kindly placed under a cut so as not to break the time/space/internet continuum of those who couldn't care less about my obsessive, solipsistic diversions.

Recs:

aerintine posted her first

seasonal_spuffy last week, and it is totally rad. It's the first chapter of a post-series fic named "Armor Thin". I'm over the moon that it has gotten such a big response so far, since both the story and the author deserve the attention. The structure of the storytelling is very unique, cross-cutting between crunching action scenes and an emotional reconciliation between the Verse's two marquis characters. Go, Run, Review, if you haven't already.

The next two recs are spawned from the same brilliant author. As part of her Seasonal Spuffy goodness,

dampersnspoons contributed a saucy little number called "The Desoto". Look, I'm a New Yawker. I don't know much about cars, because in this town if you own one you'll probably have to live in it in order to afford the parking. But this is gear-shifting, piston-grinding stuff, and with gas nearing four bucks a gallon, it might give you a few tips on what to do with your cars when you aren't driving them places.

The second rec is for the WIP "At Your Service", also by

dampersnspoons. I've been meaning to read this one, after falling in lust with her abstract, mind-bending AH masterpiece, "The Butcher," and boy am I glad I got started. In the story's alternate universe setting, Buffy makes a Faustian pact in order to survive the onslaught of mysterious supernatural foes known as the "Elders." In exchange for the Devil owning the pink slip of her soul, she is assigned a certain snarky vampire for a bodyguard. Shot through with wit, emotion and chills, it's definitely one of the most original re-imaginings of the 'Verse I've seen out there. From what I understand, she is in the process of writing the final few chapters, so this won't be a WIP for much longer. In light of that, please do feel free to get caught up in the meantime. And remember to leave some love. Authors love love.

Banners:

Ahhhhh... my absurd banner project has finally come to an end. I wound up making thirteen of them, and while I'm not in love with them all, I think a few of them actually worked out okay. If you are interested in seeing the final versions, they are tucked beneath the next cut.

( Banner graphics )

Tags: banners, btvs fanfiction, clocks of the long now, fic recs

Happy Birthday

: lostboy_lj; April 16th, 2011

Best birthday wishes to

moscow_watcher, the Watcher of Moscow! Thanks for all your awesome fandom goodness!

Banner #14 - Mystery Character!

: lostboy_lj; March 25th, 2011

Hi gang! Thanks for all your wonderful feedback on my weird graphics project so far.

Hopefully, anyone on my f-list who has read my big, dumb fic will know who this little fellow is supposed to be:

( Big version and notes under the cut )

Tags: banners, btvs fanfiction, clocks of the long now

Banner #13: Faith

: lostboy_lj; March 24th, 2011

Remember to buy your war bonds, everybody!

Large version and notes under the cut.

( Read more... )

Tags: banners, btvs fanfiction, clocks of the long now

Banners #11&12 - Riley and Nancy

: lostboy_lj; March 20th, 2011

Two more banner experiments: Riley Finn and Nancy Stark.

Large versions and notes under the cut. Feedback would be awesome! :)

( Read more... )

Tags: banners, btvs fanfiction, clocks of the long now

Banner #10 - Drusilla

: lostboy_lj; March 15th, 2011

Okay, so I keep going! Why??? Dunno, pet. Had to see about a girl, I suppose.

In that spirit, here is my clocks-i-fied Drusilla:

Large version and notes under the cut.

( Read more... )

Tags: banners, btvs fanfiction, clocks of the long now

Banner #9 - Kennedy

: lostboy_lj; March 9th, 2011

I know I said I was done with these banners, but I've become strangely obsessed with them and couldn't resist taking a stab at one or two more. Below the cut, Miriam Kennedy Corliss wants to show you something.

( Read more... )

Tags: banners, btvs fanfiction, clocks of the long now

Banners #8 - Buffy Summers

: lostboy_lj; March 7th, 2011

Here's my first attempt at a Buffy-centric banner for "Clocks of the Long Now."

A few notes under the cut.

( Read more... )

Tags: banners, btvs fanfiction, clocks of the long now

Banners - Spike revision

: lostboy_lj; March 5th, 2011

So, I re-did Spike's banner. I wasn't happy with my first attempt. Too placid, not enough conflict. Here is an alternate version:

Tags: banners, btvs fanfiction, clocks of the long now

Banners, Set #4

: lostboy_lj; March 3rd, 2011

Current Mood:: accomplished

Hi again!

So, I am continuing on my quest to... well I don't know what, exactly. Something about banners and my dumb story. Anyway, I'm trying to finish out the core four, for a total of 8 banners. I still haven't done much physical work on Buffy's (which, I guess fittingly, will be the last one), but I have a couple of ideas rolling around in my head for it. I also realized that I'm not at all content with how the Spike banner turned out, and I think Willow's needs some work. So at some point I'm going to try a completely different direction for Spike, and conduct some major heart surgery on Willow.

In the meantime, I worked up something for Xander Harris.

Okay. It's a pretty strange concept, but hear me out...

( Large banners and explanations/apologies under the cut... )

Tags: banners, btvs fanfiction, clocks of the long now

Banners, Set #3 (Willow and Giles)

: lostboy_lj; March 1st, 2011

I worked on two more banners, this time for Willow and Giles. I'm not sure how many more of these I want to do, but I think I'll at least try to finish off the "core four" with banners for Xander and Buffy.

Large versions and notes are under the cut.

( Click here to see banners )

Tags: banners, btvs fanfiction, clocks of the long now

More banner experiments

: lostboy_lj; February 27th, 2011

I attempted two more banners for my "Clocks of the Long Now" series. I'm not sure if I'll actually do anything with these, but I'm having fun nonetheless (to see the first set, click here).

Below the cut are the full size banners for Spike and Andrew Wells.
( Click here to see banners... )

Feedback would be great, thanks!

Tags: banners, btvs fanfiction, clocks of the long now

My first banner attempts

: lostboy_lj; February 26th, 2011

I've been trying my hand at banner work in my spare time. My idea was to make a few 1000x460 banners for my fic, Clocks of the Long Now , with each banner having a different character focus and corresponding treatment. Large versions of my first two attempts are under the cut.

( Click here to see banners )

I'm new to this, so both positive and negative criticism are very much welcome. Thanks!

Tags: banners, btvs fanfiction, clocks of the long now

"Boss Rush" Episode 3: The Wrath of Tron!

: lostboy_lj; February 7th, 2011

(for Episode 1, click here)
(for Episode 2 click here)

Fandom: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Warnings: astro-sex, Dune references, mermaids, universes.
Summary: The stunning conclusion!

*** deep within the bowels of Dark Horse headquarters ***

WARREN: Well, we did it.

JONATHAN: Yep. We did it.

ANDREW: Yeah. Heh.

JONATHAN: ...

ANDREW: ...

WARREN: Jeez, somebody order up a hearse, why doncha? This is our moment of triumph, fellas. Bask in the glow.

JONATHAN: ...

ANDREW: ...

WARREN: I said bask, damn you!

JONATHAN: Sorry. It's just... I dunno.

ANDREW: Derivative? Anticlimactic?

WARREN: Man, there is really no pleasing you perma-virgins, is there? I mean, I go out of my way to let you guys get do your whole weepy pathos shtick, and now I get 'anticlimactic." If it's a climax you wanted, then you should've used my notes!

JONATHAN: Warren, there's no way I was drawing 'that.' I mean... I'm not even sure 'that' is legal.

ANDREW: It is in Vermont. And Hawaii.

WARREN: ...

ANDREW: Or, uh, so, I've read.

( Read more... )

Tags: btvs fanfiction

"Boss Rush" Episode II: Warren Strikes Back

: lostboy_lj; September 24th, 2010

(for Episode 1, click here)

Fandom: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Warnings: astro-sex, Dune references, mermaids, universes.
Summary: The debate rages on!

Author's note: It occurred to me after re-reading "Boss Rush" that it might be seen as being some sort of broadside or cheap-shot at Scott Allie (who I actually think gets an undeserved bad rap in the fandom.) That's totally not the case. I was just goofin' around. In that spirit, I offer for your consideration Episode II of "Boss Rush," with a slightly different perspective on this Srs Bsns.

*** deep within the bowels of Dark Horse headquarters ***

JONATHAN: Maybe we could... gah! I dunno. Did we hear back from legal yet about the Spuffy thing?

WARREN: Oh brother. E tu, brute?

JONATHAN: Look, I've just been thinking about it and... I mean, Andrew might have a point here...

ANDREW: Yeah, no duh...

JONATHAN: Dude, what did we say about you and the "helping?"

WARREN: Uggh. You dweebs still don't get it, do you? I mean, what this is all about?

JONATHAN: Money?

ANDREW: Fame?

WARREN: Boobs, you fools! Boobs...
( Read more... )

Tags: btvs fanfiction

"Boss Rush" Episode I: Masters of the Universe

: lostboy_lj; September 22nd, 2010

Title: "Boss Rush" Episode I: Masters of the Universe
Fandom: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Length: 500 words
Warnings: astro-sex, Dune references, mermaids, universes.
Summary: Just a short while ago, while reading fangfaceandrea's latest thoughts on the Buffy comic, I arrived at a sudden conclusion about the Season 8 creative process... including the true power behind the throne!

*** deep within the bowels of Dark Horse headquarters ***

ANDREW: Ooh, I got it you guys! Let's do a "Boss Rush!"

WARREN: Weak.

JONATHAN: That's, like, soooooo Gradius II, man.

WARREN: Look, I say we just stick to the astro-naughty, universe-endy gameplan... except this time, maybe you should actually pay attention to my notes, Vincent Van Gonad!

JONATHAN: Double-D cups and extra super glowyness?

WARREN: Exactly!
( Read more... )

Tags: btvs fanfiction

Vamp Flick Review: "I Sell the Dead"

: lostboy_lj; July 12th, 2010

Just watched "I Sell the Dead" this weekend courtesy of Netflix. All in all, it was a deeply, deeply flawed little flick, albeit with a few weirdly enjoyable elements. Beware of semi-spoilers ahead (well, not really though.)

( Read more... )

Tags: reviews

Vampire movie recs (Part 1)

: lostboy_lj; June 17th, 2010

I spent a little time yesterday huffing and puffing and blowing Stephanie Meyer's zillion dollar house down. When the dust had settled, the whole thing got me to thinking about good vampire movies, so I decided to start doing mini-reviews of some of my favorites.

Included below are a pair of fang flicks I could watch over and over without my eyes rolling back into my skull like a cartoon slot machine.

( Glitter-free cinema under the cut... )

Tags: reviews

"It's the one that says Bad M***erf***er..."

: lostboy_lj; May 21st, 2010

(Thanks, Jules)

I'm not sure how much I will use this journal, as I'm not much of a journaler. The Spellchecker assures me that "journaler" isn't even a word. Then again, Spellchecker just said that "Spellchecker" isn't a word either, so I assume this paradox will cause the universe to implode or get sucked into a wormhole or whatever. Any second now...

Before it does, I might as well spam a few links to a little writing project I've been working on for a couple of years now. It's a novel length fiction called "Clocks of the Long Now." The story takes place after the events of the BTVS and ATS TV shows, and it takes matters in a very different direction from the cannonical Season Eight comic books.

It's a 130,000+ word work-in-progress.

^Translation: No one will ever read this except under threat of violence and/or castor oil. Yes! I know!!!

( Read more... )

Clocks of the Long Now: Epilogue (Part 2)

: lostboy_lj; February 7th, 2010

Clocks of the Long Now
Epilogue (or "Where We Went From There")

Fandom: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Warnings: Graphic violence, adult language, sexual situations, character death, rabbits.
Disclaimer: The characters from Buffy the Vampire Slayer are owned by Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, Fox studios and maybe various other entities that I am unaware of but totally respect and admire. This story is not meant to infringe upon anyone's rights, only to entertain.

(Part 2 of 2)

( Read more... )

~*~*~

Tags: btvs fanfiction, clocks of the long now

Clocks of the Long Now: Epilogue (Part 1 of 2)

: lostboy_lj; February 7th, 2010

( Read more... )

Tags: btvs fanfiction, clocks of the long now

Clocks of the Long Now (Chapter 45: Belongings)

: lostboy_lj; January 24th, 2010

Clocks of the Long Now
Chapter 45: Belongings

Fandom: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Warnings: Graphic violence, adult language, sexual situations, character death, rabbits.
Disclaimer: The characters from Buffy the Vampire Slayer are owned by Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, Fox studios and maybe various other entities that I am unaware of but totally respect and admire. This story is not meant to infringe upon anyone's rights, only to entertain.

Author's Notes:
The final chapter is below the cut. Thanks for reading.

( Read more... )

Tags: btvs fanfiction, clocks of the long now

Clocks of the Long Now (Chapter 44: Of Rabbits and Hats)

: lostboy_lj; January 24th, 2010

Clocks of the Long Now
Chapter 44: Of Rabbits and Hats

Fandom: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Warnings: Graphic violence, adult language, sexual situations, character death, rabbits.
Disclaimer: The characters from Buffy the Vampire Slayer are owned by Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, Fox studios and maybe various other entities that I am unaware of but totally respect and admire. This story is not meant to infringe upon anyone's rights, only to entertain.

( Read more... )

Tags: btvs fanfiction, clocks of the long now

Clocks of the Long Now (Chapter 43: The Long Now)

: lostboy_lj; January 24th, 2010

Clocks of the Long Now
Chapter 43: The Long Now

Fandom: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Warnings: Graphic violence, adult language, sexual situations, character death, rabbits.
Disclaimer: The characters from Buffy the Vampire Slayer are owned by Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, Fox studios and maybe various other entities that I am unaware of but totally respect and admire. This story is not meant to infringe upon anyone's rights, only to entertain.

.( Read more... )

Tags: btvs fanfiction, clocks of the long now

Clocks of the Long Now (Chapter 42: Auld Lang Syne)

: lostboy_lj; January 24th, 2010

Clocks of the Long Now
Chapter 42: Auld Lang Syne

Fandom: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Warnings: Graphic violence, adult language, sexual situations, character death, rabbits.
Disclaimer: The characters from Buffy the Vampire Slayer are owned by Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, Fox studios and maybe various other entities that I am unaware of but totally respect and admire. This story is not meant to infringe upon anyone's rights, only to entertain.

( Read more... )

Chapter 43: The Long Now

Tags: btvs fanfiction, clocks of the long now

Clocks of the Long Now (Chapter 41: The Ups and Downs of Modern Architecture)

: lostboy_lj; January 24th, 2010

Clocks of the Long Now
Chapter 41: The Ups and Downs of Modern Architecture

Fandom: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Warnings: Graphic violence, adult language, sexual situations, character death, rabbits.
Disclaimer: The characters from Buffy the Vampire Slayer are owned by Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, Fox studios and maybe various other entities that I am unaware of but totally respect and admire. This story is not meant to infringe upon anyone's rights, only to entertain.

( Read more... )

Tags: btvs fanfiction, clocks of the long now

Clocks of the Long Now (Chapter 40: The Real Me)

: lostboy_lj; January 24th, 2010

Clocks of the Long Now
Chapter 40: The Real Me

Fandom: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Warnings: Graphic violence, adult language, sexual situations, character death, rabbits.
Disclaimer: The characters from Buffy the Vampire Slayer are owned by Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, Fox studios and maybe various other entities that I am unaware of but totally respect and admire. This story is not meant to infringe upon anyone's rights, only to entertain.

( Read more... )

Tags: btvs fanfiction, clocks of the long now

Clocks of the Long Now (Chapter 39: Santa Muerta)

: lostboy_lj; January 24th, 2010

Clocks of the Long Now
Chapter 39: Santa Muerta

Fandom: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Warnings: Graphic violence, adult language, sexual situations, character death, rabbits.
Disclaimer: The characters from Buffy the Vampire Slayer are owned by Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, Fox studios and maybe various other entities that I am unaware of but totally respect and admire. This story is not meant to infringe upon anyone's rights, only to entertain.

( Read more... )

>>Chapter 40: The Real Me

Tags: btvs fanfiction, clocks of the long now

Clocks of the Long Now (Chapter 38: Parallel Lines)

: lostboy_lj; January 24th, 2010

Clocks of the Long Now
Chapter 38: Parallel Lines

Fandom: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Warnings: Graphic violence, adult language, sexual situations, character death, rabbits.
Disclaimer: The characters from Buffy the Vampire Slayer are owned by Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, Fox studios and maybe various other entities that I am unaware of but totally respect and admire. This story is not meant to infringe upon anyone's rights, only to entertain.

( Read more... )

Tags: btvs fanfiction, clocks of the long now

Clocks of the Long Now (Chapter 37: No Cigar)

: lostboy_lj; January 24th, 2010

Clocks of the Long Now
Chapter 37: No Cigar

Fandom: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Warnings: Graphic violence, adult language, sexual situations, character death, rabbits.
Disclaimer: The characters from Buffy the Vampire Slayer are owned by Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, Fox studios and maybe various other entities that I am unaware of but totally respect and admire. This story is not meant to infringe upon anyone's rights, only to entertain.

( Read more... )

>>Chapter 38: Parallel Lines

Tags: btvs fanfiction, clocks of the long now

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shipping-meme time!